Okay. So Mr. Geek Squad is still in the picture... and he has been since December of last year. It has been a good time and then also a time of ambivalence,insecurity and questions marks... I have to say that we have had moments that have driven me to the absolute brink... Here lately however...the Royal We, has been kinda taking a moment to think about what it is exactly that I want...From Geek Squad..and from myself.. I have enjoyed Geek Squad.. He was there when I needed him several times.. and for that..there is a feeling much stronger than like.. but is in living in the borough of LOVE? What is love anyway.. when do you love a person.. when should you stop loving them? Or begin to control your love for them or curtail it. Does loving them mean playing the fool occasionally? Does loving them mean putting yourself out there at moments when you don't feel comfortable doing so and opening yourself up to someone that has hurt you either intentionally or unintentionally? These are all questions that I would turn to my BFF Philadelphia Freedom to mull over but at the moment I think that his spendthrift habits have made him a victim or TMobile's dastardly disconnection service.. I've literally been trying to call and text that FLOOZY for the past few days with NO SUCCESS.. because TMobile keeps telling me that his phone is... D-I-S-C-O-N-N-E-C-T-E-D.... At any rate.. I have no idea where Geek Squad and I are right at the moment.. I do know that there have been times that I wanted to drive over to his house... kick down his door...and hurl a mad Raccoon at him. Usually he has provoked these reactions..So I have taken a moment to step back... and see what I am doing.. I haven't spoken to him in a few days.. he has reached out to me.. but I haven't reached back.. partly because I don't know that I can at the moment.. I feel as though there is a reason that I want Geek SquaD around...maybe I want to commit to him.. we talked ENDLESSLY about that.. and he stands firm that he is frightened of it right now.. He is seeing other people.. I am doing my thing...but yet... Geek Squad gives me butterflies.... Do you know that you shouldn't give up on someone because you cant go a minute of a day without thinking of them? Is this the barometer on which to judge weather or not you toss someone out like 2003's Durango Boots?
if hes seeing others...its a clear sign he only wants a buddy and not a sweetheart. This step back should give you a chance to reconcile these feelings within yourself with your sanity so it can help you off of this emotional rollercoaster...cause its not worth the dramatic pull...if he wants candy....let him have some...but too much candy....
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