Love Or Loneliness..... JaYLuV & Jersey....

 Well kiddies this is not something that I do often... talk about the men in my life.. Not that there are that many *wink* but in this almost 2 years that I have been experiencing my Sex and the Single Man existance, I have enjoyed the company of an occasional gent here and there...but most of this time has been devoted to me, my friendships, my work and creating a new life for myself here in Atlanta.. there hasnt been much dating.. Which brings me to my "friend" Jersey.. You may or may not remember his appearence in a prior episode.. Well...where do I begin to talk about Jersey.. Where can I start? He is a very intelligent individual, very kind... very playful...a lot of fun.. and embodies all the qualities that one would want in a potential mate.. and few that you DON'T want...but more on that later... I have to back up and explain that with this installment i decided to do something a little different from my original format... the reason being that the tune that is a companion piece to this particular passage, is VERY important.. without the song... you cannot really grasp the feeling of todays chapter..and I so want you to get the feeling.. I discovered this Diana Ross chestnut when I was a freshman in high school...I stumbled into this little dusty music store in the deserted downtown area of my hometown and found this on cassette tape.. even then i understood the utter perplexity and overall excitement she conveys in this ditty...and ultimately the CONFUSION... about dealing with this man in her life..  leaving her to ask herself "IS THIS LOVE...OR IS IT JUST LONELINESS??"at the end of the date... Dating is such a proverbial mine field to me sometimes and the subject of men is just as confounding...though im a man myself.. we still mystify and vex me :-) I find myself asking after returning home from a nite or afternoon with Jersey "is this just loneliness???" I run hot and cold when it comes to this whole spending time and romance set up... Sometimes I feel as though my heart is being danced around the stars... Others I feel unsure, off guard, out of practice and NERVOUS.. I say to myself "oh oh oh what am I gonna do???just can't fight the temptation of Loving you!!!" and then I laugh my head off at the absurdity of it all.. Is this love? or is it just loneliness!? I find it hilarious...And the whole affair is so in line with this ballad that you're hearing, that its uncanny.. I hasten to add, you can hear a certain element of FUN and Whimsy behind La Ross's delivery here... but I find it to be soo interesting that she seems so unsure and out of sorts with the whole situation..as I am. Back to myself and Jersey...to give an aerial view of this "thing"..we spend time together, he actually taught me to play cards recently..which in and of itself was such a LAUGH... and in return I made him Spaghetti and Meatballs...which he ate and enjoyed... then we didnt speak for 2 or 3 weeks :-) and  after the silence..then more of the same.. back to enjoying each other and being silly clowns.. It's so much fun, and we have each other for the sheer enjoyment of each others company..and nothing more.. there is no expectation there.. no attempting to pin down exactly WHAT it is we are doing...or place a label on it. It's fun.. plain and simple.. it feels good... it feels bad... it feels confusing.. it feels happy..it feels ugly..it feels pretty... it feels any myriad of things..and even though "SOMETIMES IT'S HARD TO TELL THE DIFFERENCE"... its not hard to tell that when the Sun comes up.. I think it's really worth it...